Why do we find it so hard to see our own worth?
It originates in our childhood. From the very beginning, we are taught to seek approval and affection from people we care about, especially people we love.
We learn to please others and when we do, we feel good about ourselves. Unfortunately, this also creates fear - fear of being rejected, having the affection withdrawn.
As we grow up, the stakes only increase and we take things more personally and try even harder to fit in to our family's and society's view of our perfect Selves.
So it's no wonder that we have a hard time valuing ourselves. How can we ever match that perfect version? As daughter, sister, mother, wife, lover professional?
Only when our 'imperfect' self is validated by another, again and again, do we believe we are worthy. As Claudius Claudianus says, "The person who seeks all their applause from outside has their happiness in another's keeping".

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Note by webmaster

According to Anthony de Mello the most addictive thing in the world is the need for approval or the fear of non approval. Look closely at what you do during the day and ask yourself why. I was amazed at how much of what I did centred around approval or dissaproval.

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